Axe this!
Just recently I went to mall to buy some showering supplies. On my list of things to get were the usual: toothpaste, shampoo, deoderant and shower gel (yes, I made the switch from soap to shower gel). I also chose to try a new shower gel .. something different .. since I have been using the Old Spice shower gel for quite awhile (and they say change is always good).
So what did I get to replace my old faithful you ask? (and thanks for asking by the way)
I chose to try that new Axe Effect "Touch" scent. I mean, I saw it on TV and the persuasive ad told me that I would have lots of luck with the ladies. Forget the fact that you're a good person, a funny person and a kind person. No way! The only way you will attract (and as the kids say today) 'da ladies is to smell great. Throw everything out the window. It's how you smell .. bottom line! ... end of story, 'nuff said! So I thought "what the heck! if it works for those dudes on TV it'll work for me!". Plus if it's on TV it's got to be true .. right?
So I rolled down the aisle, picked it up and thought I would try the stuff and that I will so do well. I was anxious .. I paid my almost $13.00 for the two items and stuck it in my bathroom when I got home and eagerly anticipated my showering experience the next day.
The next day came .. I was eager .. I hoped in the shower, lathered up and thought "this will fix everything .. all thanks to the Axe Effect! Oh yeah!". I got dressed, did my hair and all the while was so optimistic. I then rolled off into the night thinking I smelled great (again all thanks to the Axe Effect) and problem solved. I arrived at my destination and assumed my usual sitting position at said destination. I was feeling it, smelling good and man this is going to be the shiznit, off the hizzle fo' shizzle yo and what a night it will be!
So has it worked? Did it work? Has Jay finally found the love of his life based off the notion that he smells good and that the Axe Effect people told me I will attract the ladies in droves? (again throwing every other personality trait you have out the window)
Uh .. no
So I have to ask: Can I sue for this? is this false advertising or am I just THAT inept? (I plead the 5th on the last choice and which is the most suitable answer I am sure but I'll blame the Axe Effect people anyways)
Draw your own conclusions?
I think so!
So what did I get to replace my old faithful you ask? (and thanks for asking by the way)
I chose to try that new Axe Effect "Touch" scent. I mean, I saw it on TV and the persuasive ad told me that I would have lots of luck with the ladies. Forget the fact that you're a good person, a funny person and a kind person. No way! The only way you will attract (and as the kids say today) 'da ladies is to smell great. Throw everything out the window. It's how you smell .. bottom line! ... end of story, 'nuff said! So I thought "what the heck! if it works for those dudes on TV it'll work for me!". Plus if it's on TV it's got to be true .. right?
So I rolled down the aisle, picked it up and thought I would try the stuff and that I will so do well. I was anxious .. I paid my almost $13.00 for the two items and stuck it in my bathroom when I got home and eagerly anticipated my showering experience the next day.
The next day came .. I was eager .. I hoped in the shower, lathered up and thought "this will fix everything .. all thanks to the Axe Effect! Oh yeah!". I got dressed, did my hair and all the while was so optimistic. I then rolled off into the night thinking I smelled great (again all thanks to the Axe Effect) and problem solved. I arrived at my destination and assumed my usual sitting position at said destination. I was feeling it, smelling good and man this is going to be the shiznit, off the hizzle fo' shizzle yo and what a night it will be!
So has it worked? Did it work? Has Jay finally found the love of his life based off the notion that he smells good and that the Axe Effect people told me I will attract the ladies in droves? (again throwing every other personality trait you have out the window)
Uh .. no
So I have to ask: Can I sue for this? is this false advertising or am I just THAT inept? (I plead the 5th on the last choice and which is the most suitable answer I am sure but I'll blame the Axe Effect people anyways)
Draw your own conclusions?
I think so!
posted by Spatchula at 11:43 PM
3 comments
